Giving When It Hurts a Little

I have to be honest, I used to feel like I was a decently generous person. When I was in high school and college I didn’t have a lot of money or anything, but I liked when I was able to do nice things for people. I would buy someone a coffee, or gladly let them borrow a shirt or pair of shoes without thinking twice. Those things were nice enough, but relatively easy to do. I could do things like that without really feeling a pinch.  They were just nice enough to make me feel good, but not really anything that required a big sacrifice.

And then I met my husband. Brandon is, without a doubt, the most generous person I’ve ever known. When we were first married we got a new washer and dryer and sold our old set to someone for $100. This was right before Christmas and as we were getting ready to leave to be with Brandon’s family I remembered the $100 cash that was sitting on my dresser and made a mental note to go grab it before we left. I mean, it was Christmas, and we had an extra $100. I planned on taking that cash straight to the mall and to buy myself something nice. Before I made it back to grab the money, Brandon said…”Oh, we need to make sure to grab that cash from selling the washer and dryer before we leave.” I kind of laughed and told him I’d just been thinking about that and had meant to go get it. He followed that up with…”It’s Christmas…we’re going to come across someone who can use that money.” And that right there summed up the difference between him and me. My heart sank a little and at the same time swelled with pride. I don’t remember who that money went to, but I do know that it wasn’t to Macy’s for a new pair of jeans for me. It was a little hard for me. It’s easy to give what doesn’t cost you anything, but giving when it hurts a little? That’s a different story.

It’s hard to give without a backup plan. It’s hard to let go of something you know you won’t get back, or to give when you aren’t guaranteed a return. But brace yourself, because He’ll ask. He might ask you to give an extra twenty in the offering when you don’t have grocery money to get through the week. He might ask you to give time when your schedule is already packed out. He might ask you to give grace to someone who doesn’t deserve it. But whatever it is, rest assured He’ll ask. Some things will hurt a little, some will hurt a lot. But that's not the important part...saying yes is.

Think about Abraham. In Genesis 22 we read the story of his yes. After years of waiting for his promise, the fulfillment was right before his eyes and suddenly God was asking for it back. He was asked to give back the promise, without any kind of guarantee that he would get it back. God asked for his yes, and when he gave it, a nation was born.

Think about Esther. Her people, all of them, were being threatened. God asked her to step out in faith and courage and be the one to bring deliverance to Israel. Just approaching the king could cost her her very life, and yet that’s exactly what God was asking her to do. He asked for her yes, and when she gave it an entire population was saved.

Speaking of Christmas, think about Mary. In Luke 2 we can find the story of her yes. She was good, she was happy, she followed the rules. She was highly favored. And she was asked to give…she was asked to give of herself, even when it hurt. Saying yes destroyed her reputation. Threatened her upcoming marriage. Threatened her life. She was asked to give of herself, even when it hurt. He asked for her yes, and when she gave it, salvation was made possible for us all.

Now think about yourself. What is God asking you to say yes to? What does He want you to give, even when it hurts a little? And what can He do with your yes? You might not have a book written about you...but you might. Maybe people won't  talk about you for years to come, using you as inspiration when they're asked to say yes…but they might. Maybe you'll impact millions, maybe you'll impact one. We will probably never know the full impact of our "yes". We might know the impact it had on us, we might remember how hard it was or what the yes cost us, but only eternity will tell us the whole story. I remember many times God has asked me for a yes when it hurt a little. Giving forgiveness to someone who had hurt me, giving time to help when I felt like I barely had none, giving a gift that was dear to me...that I knew would be irreplaceable. It was hard, it hurt, and I sometimes wonder if I could do it again if the opportunity was in front of me...but I do know that God was faithful in my yes. He never left us in need, He never left us hurt.

Make it a yes, even if it hurts a little.